[Barlibash] travel plans

[daisy]

As you make your travel plans for Chicago, keep this in mind :) 

Daisy



Why Some People Shouldn't Be Allowed To Travel. 


The following are actual stories provided by travel agents:

1.     I had someone ask for an aisle seat so that their hair wouldn't 
get messed up by being near the window.

2.    A client called in inquiring about a package to Hawaii. After 
going over all the cost information, she asked, "Would it be cheaper to 
fly to California and then take the train to Hawaii?"

 3.     I got a call from a woman who wanted to go to Capetown. I 
started to explain the length of the flight and the passport information 
when she interrupted me with "I'm not trying to make you look stupid, 
but Cape Town is in Massachusetts."   Without trying to make her look 
like the stupid one, I calmly explained, "Cape Cod is in         
Massachusetts, Capetown is in Africa." Her response was "click".

 4.     A man called, furious about a Florida package we did. I asked 
what was wrong with the vacation in Orlando. He said he was expecting an 
ocean-view room. I tried to explain that is not possible, since Orlando 
is in the middle of the state. He replied, "Don't lie to me. I looked on 
the map and Florida is a very thin state."

5.    I got a call from a man who asked, "Is it possible to see England 
from Canada?" I said, "No." He said, "But they look so  close on the map."

6.     Another man called and asked if he could rent a car in Dallas. 
When I pulled up the reservation, I noticed he had a 1-hour lay over in 
Dallas. When I asked him why he wanted to rent a car, he said, "I heard 
Dallas was a big airport, and  I need a car to drive between the gates 
to save time."

7.    A nice lady just called. She needed to know how it was possible 
that her flight from Detroit left at 8:20am and got into Chicago at 
8:33am. I tried to explain that Michigan was an hour ahead of Illinois, 
but she could not understand the concept of time zones. Finally I told 
her the plane went very fast, and she bought that!

8.     A woman called and asked, "Do airlines put your physical 
description on your bag so they know whose luggage  belongs to who?" I 
said, "No, why do you ask?" She replied, "Well, when I checked in with 
the airline, they put a tag on  my luggage that said FAT, and I'm 
overweight, is there any connection?" After putting her on hold for a 
minute while "I looked into it," (I was actually laughing) I came back 
and explained that the city code for Fresno is FAT, and that the  
airline was just putting a destination tag on her luggage.

9.    I just got off the phone with a man who asked, "How do I know 
which plane to get on?" I asked him what exactly he  meant, to which he 
replied, "I was told my flight number is 823, but none of these darn 
planes have numbers on them.

10.    "A woman called and said, "I need to fly to Pepsi-cola on one of 
those computer planes." I asked if she meant to fly to Pensacola on a 
commuter plane. She said, "Yeah, whatever."

11.    A businessman called and had a question about the documents he 
needed in order to fly to China. After a lengthy discussion about 
passports, I reminded him he needed a visa. "Oh no I don't, I've been to 
China many times and never had to have one of those. " I double-checked 
and sure enough, his stay required a visa. When I told him this he said, 
"Look, I've been to China four times and every time they have accepted 
my American Express."

12.     A woman called to make reservations. "I want to go from Chicago 
to Hippopotamus, New York." The agent was at a loss for words. Finally, 
the agent asked, "Are you sure that's the name of the town?" "Yes, what 
flights do you have?" replied the customer. After some searching, the 
agent came back with, "I'm sorry, ma'am, I've looked up every airport 
code in the country and can't find a Hippopotamus anywhere." The 
customer retorted, "Oh don't be silly. Everyone knows where it is. Check 
your map!" The agent scoured a map of the state of New York and finally 
offered, "You don't  mean Buffalo, do you?"   "That's it!   I knew it 
was a big animal!"